no tears in death~

Monday, April 21, 2008

torn into pieces, 4/21/2008 10:56:00 PM

Life currently suck... real bad.

today has been quite a screwed up day. actually... its been a great day until after school. i was in a great mood and decided to go for sectionals early so that i can do some catching up of my own. first couldn't find the file. then, they had jazz band, which (CONVINIENTLY FOR EVERYONE) i am not in. whatever. i knew it was coming anyway. just say it to my face, don't beat around the freakin' bush. i was about to pull out anyway. i'm not that dense. it doesn't take a genius to read between the lines.

then, had to practice on my own. had a breakdown. smsed liyana and told her i needed someone. i am so grateful to her for being there for me. even though she was already out of school and on her way home already, she came back to school for me. thanks loads =)

im just frustrated with everyone, including me. its that phase in life again where i feel like everything is falling to pieces and im struggling so hard to remain standing. i feel like no matter what i do, i'll never be good enough. cos whatever it is that i do, there is always someone better. i am always second best. always. and i am getting sick of it.

i wanna give up, but i don't want to. cos i know if i do, i will regret it for the rest of my life. besides, i am so not a quitter. but... sigh. i've reached the point of exhaustion - feeling so drained out that i don't feel alive at all.

in secondary school days, i've always loved band. its the thing that kept me ticking. but jc band is just different. i still love it, but it just isn't the same........

i suck. i suck. i suck.

no more tears

TiNy pEeK-a-BoO iNtO My LiFe :-
-a ScOrPiO
-a TJCian!!
-LoVeS MuSiC!
-LoVeS TrUmPeT To tHe eXtReMe!!
-LoVeS aMaThS & bIoLoGy!
-EaSy gOiNg but nEvEr PiSs mE OfF
-VeRy cRaZy :)

I just love:
.music.
.trumpet.
.band.
.my mum's fried rice.
.stars.
.star gazing.
.romantic walks by the beach.
.reading storybooks.
.amaths.
.biology.
.him~.

i so hate:
.bimbos.
.bitches.
.jerks.
.~~them~~.

laptop
digi cam
new school bag
get into tjc

KaK JiHaN
tAuFiQ
mIcHeLLe
iNdRa
YuSnEeTa
eLLiOtZ
rEuBeN
jUsTiN
yOcK KiAt
wAn LiNg

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